I think me talking with my ex-girlfriend caused my wife to run away?

The fact that you hung out with your ex IS probably the reason for her leaving. I mean she was giving you clues like being grumpy. No woman wants her husband or boyfriend hanging around their ex. They want to know that they're number one with you and not your ex. Would you be ok with her hanging out with her ex? I don't think so. I would go to her and do all you can to convince her that she is number one in your life. If you don't, you may just lose here forever.